Forbidden

Shhh. Do you know what it’s like not to be able to open your mouth? Not to be allowed to speak the truth? Up to the point that it’s stuck inside of you, eating you away like some kind of suicidal disease that’s killed billions before you? But not me, I don’t know about any of that.

He’s Adam and I’m Eve. It’s wanting the forbidden, not the fruit itself that’s so tempting. No apple, no matter how shiny, juicy, and ripe can tempt me into eating it. But the serpent? The long, slithery, provocative serpent tempting me into what I just cannot have? Yes, please. And God? Who is God to stop me? What rights does he have, as my creator, my father, to control my every action? The fruit is forbidden so I must have it. I grab the fruit and share it with Adam and we indulge in this luxury. Oh how romantic and ripe and right this indulgence is. In this moment, nobody has power over us. What’s so forbidden about a moment that’s being experienced that very second? The moment was ours and no God, however how almighty, could stop us.

It’s worth taking the forbidden even if comes with the weight of anxiety. Do you like the way the thoughts keep bombarding your mind? But be quiet, you must not complain! Remember, silence is key in this game. Carry the load of truth in your body; eating away at your translucent skin. If you move too quickly, they’ll see the secrets inside you and you’ll have more than anxiety within.

Before God can stop us, we’re Pyramus and Thisbe. Pyramus’ voice silently calls to me like the prayers of an angel wishing for us. Their prayers are the same, over and over and over, as if their repetitions will double our luck. The soft, warm hush of breath warms the wall around the crack that my ears are picking up his sweet sounds off of. He calls to me and the voices of our parents forbidding us any contact make his voice all the more enticing. With one word, he drowns out all of their voices. What more are these Babylonian barriers than communication carriers? We don’t allow the intention of an invention to stop us and instead, we use it to carry out the deepest of desires. Before we meet near Ninus’ tomb, I will enjoy the simplicity of calmness in his voice. Words get half their meaning from the way they are said, from the way lips curve around them. We’ll meet, yes, we’ll meet under a mulberry tree, but for now, this wall is ours to carry out speech.

Words, no matter how alike, change when spoken to different people. The authenticity in one’s voice can easily be detected, as can the hesitation of a lie. So you must not speak. Does the morality and ethics of this bother you? Is it biting away at the happiness in your life like a bitter wind chill raping your skin of warmth and replacing it with invisible icicles barely hanging on by the tiny hairs on your arms? You have to suck it up. What is a human if the thought of pain doesn’t burden their every minute? How does a human grow and evolve if not tortured by the pressures of life, like the pressure taken in by a diamond? Bear with me, child and don’t be so selfish. It’s not just you in this moment; there are many “yous” ahead of you, with many “yous” before. Don’t be fooled by the simplicity of the present.

But for now, the Mulberry tree can wait. Right now, I’m Juliet and he’s my Romeo. What’s more exciting about a forbidden last name than wanting it to become your own? My parent’s dislikes are not my own, and I shall become his- I will be Romeo’s. No ball is more social than combining two names forbidden to be together in one place. No balcony serves a better purpose than allowing us to gather as close to the heavens as one possibly could.