told me you’ll thank me some day – language borrowed from 1-star yelp reviews of cosmetic surgeons

“a hung out hexology” by Laura Heckel

 
1
reality is that i have only seen the doctor once after my surgery
and that is because i haunt him.
 

2
i had drains in my legs and they were starting to leak.

my drains my legs dripping all over the floor

& this idiot says they have no gauze.
 

3
some consulter name jessie lied out her a**hole to get me down to the office,
then gave me a quote on a sticky note.
 

4
fyi none of the nurses speaks english
not even a little so they will be no help
all they do is sit on the kitchen table

after surgery he proudly told me
that he overfilled both implants
by 15cc.

as a thin woman with very little breast tissue
the unevenness of my breasts is unsightly
in business clothes. every day

i am reminded of this.
 

5
had surgery in april : “mommy makeover.”
my stomach was left ruined.

they have blamed it on me having a child
but my stomach looks worse than it did before.

do not trust that man with anything,
especially your body.

he does not consider the sacrifices we have to make
to feel better about our self.
 

6
i felt like a number in a chicken shack.  the waiting
room looks like a fucking welfare office. people filling out paperwork
on the floor.  you know they have an armed security guard?

you people waiting there are idiots.

we in houston texas    y’all motherfuckers better wake up.